What_Is_Belonging

What is belonging' The dictionary tells us that ‘belonging’ means, to be in a right place, and to feel happy and comfortable with a certain group of people. However, when we use ‘belonging’ to relate to our life, it often means more than just a definition. Life is about belonging, and belonging is ultimately about acceptance. We choose to belong because we want to be accepted, and we decide not to belong because we want to belong in a right place. In the play, Educating Rita written by Willy Russel, and the movie, Strictly Ballroom directed by Baz Luhrmann, has shown us two great examples of how belonging would influence a person’s life and decision and demonstrated the relations between belonging and acceptance. Rita, the main character in Willy Russel’s play, is a hairdresser who has been trying to discover herself though education. In order to achieve her goal, she has to give up where she used to belong, that is, life with her husband and have children, going to pub drinking and singing and speaking in improper language. There was a scene when Rita didn’t go to Frank’s party, then she went to pub to meet Danny, her parents and their friends. Everyone was so happy and singing with each other except Rita’s mum and herself. Rita’s mother said to her ‘There must be a better song to sing’ which gives Rita an indication of ‘there must be a different life to live…’ Rita has changed herself to be accepted, she has shifts her identity from a wife, a mother, and a hairdresser to an Open University student. She is so keen and eager to learn and to be educated, because she believes it can assist her to discover herself, to belong to where she wants to belong, and gives her a sense of belonging and acceptance. Scott Hastings, the main actor in Baz Luhrmann’s movie – Strictly Ballroom, has been doing ballroom dancing under strict regulated rules since he was a kid. In the movie, all the dancers follow the ballroom dancing rules except Scott. Sometimes, we are forced to change our preferences, behaviours and attitudes in order to belong in a group. Just like Scott’s friends and the audiences, they have seen Scott’s own steps, and they like it, but they aren’t going to say anything, because if they express their passion about the new dancing, they will be criticised like Scott, and that’s the influences of the belonging. To belong and to be accepted, you have to have the mind set like the majority of the people in your group. Throughout the film, Scott has shown his struggles with his own steps, he wasn’t sure whether it is right to have his own steps or not because it is not ‘accepted’ under the ballroom dancing rules. But Fran, his dancing partner has consistently given him courage and an indication of not caring about how other people feel about his dancing steps but his true feelings towards it. As a result, it shows us acceptance should come from our heart first, if you don’t accept yourself, and you can’t expect people to accept who you are and what you have. ‘Belonging is ultimately about acceptance’. In order to belong, we change ourselves or we prove to other people in order to be accepted. In Rita’s case, she changes herself such as the clothes she wears and the way she talks to fit in a Universities’ students’ role, and in Scott’s case, he dances his own steps with Fran to win everyone over and to prove the audiences that their dancing style should be accepted. Acceptance gives us a sense of belonging. People has to change the way they do things, the perspectives they see things, and sacrifice the things they love in order to belong and be accepted.