Understanding_Nourishes_Belonging....Alack_of_Understanding_Prevents_It._Romulus,_My_Father.

“Understanding nourishes belonging…. A lack of understanding prevents it.” A sense of belonging emerges from the connections people make within their world. Different texts explore many aspects of belonging and these different aspects can be considered in terms of understanding. The Memoir ‘Romulus, My Father’ by Raimond Gaita is an example of a text in which a failure to understand leads to a barrier which prevents belonging. The Novel ‘The Catcher in the Rye’ by J.D. Salinger portrays a difference in opinion or perspective and this difference is what leads to a failure to understand. The short story ‘Sand’ by Tim Winton places a particular emphasis on how relationships and acceptance can lead to understanding and in turn a sense of belonging. Specific experiences in a person’s life can have large effects on the person and can lead to a lack of understanding and a break in a relationship. Relationships, experiences and understanding are vital aspects of belonging and without them certain connections cannot be made and a sense of belonging might not emerge. In the memoir ‘Romulus, My Father’ by Raimond Gaita the composer recounts his childhood and goes deeply into the characterisation of his Father. Romulus is described by Raimond as a man with strong ‘beliefs and values’ and this aspect of his father’s identity is what caused Raimond a great deal of misunderstanding which acted a s a barrier of belonging. Raimond reminisces on a specific time in his childhood when he was staying with his father at Cairn Curran. Romulus’ roommate Schwaba was accusing Raimond of stealing his aftershave, which he did. Romulus asks Raimond whether he did and Raimond continues to lie saying he ‘did not touch it.’ Raimond then explains how his father’s ‘temper flared’ and that he smacked him. Raimond uses descriptive language to explain his father’s anger which highlights that Romulus’ laws or beliefs were unbreakable. Raimond could not understand his father’s arrogance at such a young age and he could not accept his father’s values. This led to a break in the relationship and Raimond’s sense of belonging vanished. From this incident it is evident that experiences, acceptance, relationships and understanding are key features of belonging and a lack of understanding can impact on all of them and can lead to a barrier which prevents belonging. J.D. Salinger is able to emphasise the same point but from another person’s perspective. Holden Caulfield, the antagonist in the Novel, shares the same historical context as Raimond and Romulus but his cultural, social and personal contexts are quite different. He is a sixteen year old boy living in New York and is at war with himself. The Novel is centred on Holden’s isolation from the society around him although the Novel shows this in a complex, ambiguous and transitory way so it is hard to identify. Holden is unable to understand and accept the idea that he is becoming an adult and he actually denies it. He believes all adults are ‘phonies’ and this is one reason for his isolation. Throughout the novel he is extremely judgemental of everyone around him and because of this fails to belong in most of the places he goes. He has already been kicked out of four schools, the latest being Pencey. When being asked why he got expelled from so many schools he actually comments that he left one of the schools on his own accord. He say’s ‘I left Elkton Hills because I was surrounded by phonies.’ J.D. Salinger uses the word ‘phonies’ as a language technique emphasising Holden’s inability to identify with why they were all ‘phonies’. Holden’s failure to understand adulthood and his inability to accept others means he is unable to form a relationship with other people. Holden’s situation is the same as for Raimond Gaita and the fact. Again it is evident that a failure to understand leads to an inability to accept and form a relationship and this forms a barrier which prevents belonging. The fact that Raimond and Holden share different cultural and personal contexts further emphasises the point that a lack of understanding prevents belonging. The connections made between people and the relationships they form are a key feature of belonging. This argument is portrayed in the short story ‘sand’ by Tim Winton where the protagonist Frank shares the same problems as Holden and Raimond even though their attitudes to belonging do change over time. Frank is an 8 year old boy with an older brother max who is 10. Franks parents are divorced and Frank see’s his dad rarely and cannot understand why this is the case but he doesn’t ponder over the question. In the opening sequence of the story Frank reveals that “it took a few days every summer to understand the dark cracks in his (fathers) palms.” Time Winton than say’s “now that he was used to him, frank loved his father.” The “dark cracks in his palms” is a metaphor for Franks father as a whole and who he is as a person. Through this language technique we can see that when Frank did not understand his Father he felt he had no relationship with him and did not belong. But when he began to understand his father he formed a relationship with him and “loved him”. From this simple example it is highly evident how Understanding nourishes belonging and a lack of understanding prevents it. It is also evident that relationships and experiences (staying with his Father) are key features of belonging. The father-son relationship seen in ‘Romulus, May Father’ is another source of misunderstanding as the intergenerational divide which separates them leads to a difference in opinion and values as they have both grown up in different historical and cultural contexts. This is evident in the part of the book where Raimond is awakened to the new ideas and emotions of the pop culture of the time led by Elvis Presley. Raimond falls in to a culture of rebellion after listening to the ideas in Elvis Presley’s song ‘Baby let’s play house.’ Romulus could not accept this behaviour and music because he did not understand the stage of life Raimond was going through. Raimond even reveals “It deeply offended his ideal of respect paid to elders” so it shook Romulus’ morality. Indirect dialogue in the form of rhetorical questions was even used like “is this what Raimond was coming to”. This rhetorical question highlights Romulus’ fears and failure to understand his son’s motivations at this stage in his life. Because of the intergenerational divide between Romulus and Raimond there are times were the Father won’t understand the Son’s actions and therefore won’t accept them. The combination of the failure to understand and accept leads to a fault in the relationship (Romulus rips up Raimond’s Elvis books) and this means both the father and son lose their sense of belonging. The idea of an intergenerational divide is also evident in ‘Sand’. The protagonist Frank is unable to understand why his brother Max can fit in with his father and his friends and “make them laugh”. Frank was unable to relate to his father and his friends because of the intergenerational gap but also partly because of the difference in identity. Frank was too young to understand these concepts and therefore believed his father did not accept and this is encouraged by Max who bullies Frank frequently. Frank has one experience where he “poops his pants” at school. He comments how he had to wait in the toilet for hide Mother to come. Max finds out about the incident and comes into the toilet. He tells the young Frank to “clean himself up” and also “you’re adopted, they found you on the tip in a kennel.” The negative connotations of Max’s words led Frank to think he did something wrong but he did not understand what and from then on he felt Isolated from his brother. This isolation leads frank to believe that his Father also didn’t accept him and this belief is encouraged by the fact that Frank’s parents split up and naturally he blamed himself for the divorce. So the misunderstanding between Frank and his brother and father leads to problems relating to relationships, acceptance and experience and this causes a barrier to Frank’s belonging. Holden Caulfield initially accepts his alienation and believes that the cause of it is the ‘phoniness’ of everyone else. As his isolation continues, and he leaves school to be alone in New York City, his attitude to belonging changes. Instead of accepting his Isolation he seeks out company in the form of previous acquaintances like the girls Sally Hayes and Jane Gallagher. Both these meetings fail and he cannot seem to understand why and does not accept that he is the problem. His alienation haunts him so he seeks out somewhere he can belong and this turns out be the Museum of Natural History. Holden say’s “The best thing about that museum was that everything stayed right where it was. Nobody’d move.” Holden is uncomfortable with change and seems to not understand it. He therefore avoids change. In the Novel change, and the transition from adolescence into adulthood, is what Holden fails to understand and they are a barrier to him belonging because seemingly everybody else has found a way to accept the change. His inability to accept change leads to problems with relationships and this in turn brings on his alienation. In conclusion, Tim Winton, J.D. Salinger and Raimond Gaita use the structure of their texts and a diverse range of literary techniques to explore the nature of alienation and belonging. The combination of misunderstanding, acceptance, relationships and experiences lead to a sense of isolation. By examining the experiences of Holden, Frank and Raimond and analysing their failure to understand certain aspects of life it is evident that a lack of understanding prevents belonging. Through the protagonists mistakes, in each text, the composer and responder can identify that understanding nourishes belonging. By Mile Petkovic