Understanding_Counseling_Theory.

Counselling and Psychotherapy theories ………. Unit R/601/7575 .The 1940’s and 50’s………a very brief History The 1940's and 1950's marked an important expansion in the field of counselling. The US psychologist Carl Rogers (said to be influenced by Alfred Adler and Otto Rank) established the person centred approach, which is at the heart of most current practice. The person centred approach is now listed under the 'humanistic' branch of psychotherapy. There are now thought to be three general types of psychological therapies; 1) Behavioural therapies, 2) Psychoanalytical and psychodynamic therapies 3) Humanistic therapies It is the last type, the humanistic therapies that I want to concentrate on and in particular the Rogerian (Carl Rogers) influenced “Person Centred Approach” but before I do, a quick comment on the humanistic approach Humanistic Therapies Humanistic therapy emerged in the 1950's and although behavioural therapy and psychoanalytic methods were available, a humanistic approach offered individuals another alternative. This approach focuses on recognising the human capabilities in areas such as creativity, personal growth and choice. Two major theorists associated with this approach are Carl Rogers and Abraham Maslow. Carl Rogers being the better known publicly and Abraham Maslow defining his work under the heading of Transpersonal Psychology this had strong echo’s and structures of the TA model often attributed to Maslow. The main goals of humanistic psychologies are to find out how individuals perceive themselves here and now and to recognise growth, self-direction and responsibilities. This method is optimistic and attempts to help individuals recognise their strengths by offering a non-judgemental, understanding experience. Three therapeutic approaches………. 1) Person-Centred (also known as “Client-Centred” or “Rogerian” Counselling) This approach to counselling and psychotherapy sees human beings as having an innate tendency to develop towards their full potential. But this is inevitably blocked or distorted by our life experiences, in particular those who tell us we are only loved or valued if we behave in certain ways (condition of worth) and not others, or have certain feelings and not others. As a result, because we have a deep need to feel valued, we tend to distort or deny to our awareness those of our inner experiences that we believe will not be acceptable. The counsellor or psychotherapist in this approach aims to provide an environment in which the client does not feel under threat or judgement. This enables the client to experience and accept more of who they are as a person, and reconnect with their own values and sense of self-worth. This reconnection with their inner resources enables them to find their own way to move forward. The counsellor or psychotherapist works to understand the client's experience from the client's point of view, and to positively value the client as a person in all aspects of their humanity, while aiming to be open and genuine as another human being. These attitudes of the therapist towards the client will only be helpful if the client experiences them as real within the relationship, and so the nature of the relationship that the counsellor and client create between themselves is crucial for the success of therapy. I expand on the approach a little later 2) Gestalt Therapy Gestalt Therapy focuses on the whole of an individual's experience; their thoughts, feelings and actions, and concentrates on the 'here and now' - what is happening from one moment to the next. Roughly translated from German, Gestalt means 'whole' and was developed in the 1940's by Fritz Perls. The main goal of this approach is for the individual to become more self-aware, taking into account their mind, body and soul. A therapist will constantly promote the client's awareness of themselves and often uses experiments that are created by the therapist and client. These experiments can be anything from creating patterns with objects and writing to role-playing. Promoting self-awareness is the main objective of gestalt therapy but other areas such as improving the ability to support ones emotional feelings are also important. Gestalt therapy is influenced by psychoanalytic theory and therapists will concentrate on 'here and now' experiences to remove obstacles created by past experiences. 3) Transactional Analysis Transactional Analysis is a theory that involves an individual's growth and development. It is also a theory related to communication and child development explaining the connections to our past and how this influences decisions we make. Transactional Analysis was developed during the late 1950's by psychiatrist Eric Berne. Berne recognised three key “ego-states” - Parent, Adult and Child. The Parent ego state is a set of thoughts, feelings and behaviours we learnt from our parents and other important people. The Adult ego state relates to direct responses to the 'here and now' that are not influenced by our past. The Child ego state is a set of thoughts, feelings and behaviours learnt from our childhood. The ego-states are useful for analysing unconscious scripts and "games" people play, (Berne E 1964 The Games People Play) Transactional Analysis seeks to identify what goes wrong in communication and provide opportunities for individuals to change repetitive patterns that limit their potential. It encourages individuals to analyse previous decisions they have made to understand the direction and patterns of their life for themselves. It also helps clients to trust their decisions and think/act as an individual improving the way they feel about themselves. TA is a humanistic approach and like Person-Centred Counselling focuses on the here and now concept. The model from within the Humanistic school I would like to major on is Carl Rogers and the Person Centred Approach and although touched on above in limited detail I would like to now expand the topic. The Person Centred Approach. Carl Rogers A brief history and main philosophy Carl Rogers (1902 - 1987) was born in Oak Park, Illinois, and as said is the founder of 'client-centred' or 'non-directive' therapy, We today use the term “Person Centred” and it was to be until the late 1950’s that Rogers himself succumbed and used this description. Rogers initially studied theology - and as part of his studies acted as the pastor/vicar in a small church in Vermont before turning to what was to be his main centre of interest and that being clinical psychology and constructive educational methods which he then studied at the Teachers' College of Columbia University. It was here that he was influenced by such diverse sources as Otto Rank (an Austrian psychologist who was part of Sigmund Freud's inner circle). and John Dewey (who was an American Philosopher, psychologist. and educational reformer and it’s said it’s his ideas have been influential in education and social reform. Dewey was also an important early developer of the philosophy of pragmatism and one of the founders of functional psychology) these last two being essential to Rogers (Rogers 1962) as he developed his alternative to the then radical but accepted “Freudian” approach. This mix of influences and Carl Roger’s ability to link elements together helps to put into context his later achievements. The concern with opening up to, and theorising from experience, the concept of the human organism as a whole and the belief in the possibilities of human actions have many parallels in other works and theories and John Dewey and his explanations on Pragmatism is one example. Carl Rogers was able to join these with therapeutic insights, some obtained from other peoples work and as he honed the belief, which borne out by his practice experience, that the client usually knows better to how to proceed than the therapist. It’s from this concept that Rogers decided that it is the quality of the counsellor’s presence that would become the most important element of a therapeutic relationship Though Carl Rogers had many theories he wished to study, it was not until his PhD on Clinical Evaluation on Child Trauma in 1931 that he began to develop some of his theories which he was to base his later life on. Some 9 years later in 1940 the theory he was to propagate through the rest of his life was unveiled at Minnesota University and was entitled “Some newer concepts in Psychotherapy”. It was at this lecture that he uttered the phrase that was to clearly move him away from Freud, Addler and his own contemporise for he said this... “Each person has within her/himself vast resources for self understanding, for altering his or her concept, attitudes and self-directed behaviour- and that these resources can only be tapped if a definable climate of facilitative psychological attitude can be provided” It was this one seminal and creative idea which was to define a course of therapies moving away from the interventionist of Freudian, Jungarian and Adder approaches and I suppose to give hope to the formulating minds of Eric Berne and Fritz Perles. Some Core conditions of Person centred approach, It is not too simplistic to affirm that the whole conceptual framework of Carl Rogers rests on his profound experience that human beings become increasingly trustworthy once they feel at a deep level that their subjective experience is both respected and progressively understood. We can see this belief at work in his best known contribution - the 'core conditions' for facilitative (counselling and educational) practice - which are, congruence (realness), acceptance and empathy) (Rogers 1962) What are these qualities, these attitudes that facilitate personal learning and understanding' Realness or genuineness in the Counsellor. Perhaps the most basic of these essential attitudes is realness or genuineness. When the Counsellor or facilitator is a real person, being what she is, entering into a relationship with the client without presenting a front or a façade, she is much more likely to be effective. This means that the feelings that she is experiencing are available to her, available to her awareness, that she is able to live these feelings, be them, and able to communicate if appropriate. It means coming into a direct personal encounter with the Counsellor, meeting her on a person-to-person basis. It means that she is being herself, and not denying herself. Prizing, acceptance, trust. Rogers said (Rogers 1963) that there is another attitude that stands out in those who are successful in facilitating a situation of trust and client learning and that is prizing (Rogers 1963) the counsellor or learner, prizing the feelings, the opinions, the person. Rogers said it is a caring for the client, but a non-possessive caring. It is an acceptance of this other individual as a separate person, having worth in her own right. It is a basic trust - a belief that this other person is somehow fundamentally trustworthy… What I am describing and I think Roger’s meant is a prizing of the client as an imperfect human being with many feelings, many potentialities. The counsellor or facilitator (Rogers other description of himself) prizing or acceptance of the client is an operational expression of her essential confidence and trust in the capacity of the human organism. Empathic understanding. A further element that establishes a climate for self-initiated experiential learning is emphatic understanding. When the counsellor has the ability to understand the clients reactions from the inside, has a sensitive awareness of the way the process of “personal understanding” seems to be for the client, then again the likelihood of significant personal progress for the client is increased. Clients feel deeply appreciative when they are simply understood– not evaluated, not judged, simply understood from their own point of view, not the counsellor or facilitators (Rogers 1967) This approach has a number of attractions for those seeking to work with the 'whole person' and to promote the clients development. Notions of wholeness overlap with what Carl Rogers describes as congruence or 'realness'; and the attitude embodied and conveyed by counsellors may be accepting and valuing of the client (Rogers 1951).. The strength of the Roger’s approach lies in part in his focus on the relationship between the two parties working together. Rogers went on to say “The structure of the self (client) appears to become more rigid under threat; to relax its boundaries when completely free from threat...” And isn’t that true for ourselves today, if we are honest that is! Roger's influence Carl Rogers was an accomplished communicator - both in person and through his writings and films (Most available on You Tube). He was also a committed practitioner who looked to his own experiences. He was able to demystify therapy; to focus on the person of the counsellor and the client; and crucially to emphasise honesty and the destructiveness of manipulation hence his constant referral to be none judgmental and directional. In short, he offered a new way, a break with earlier traditions. Crucially these concerns flagged up with the interests of other groups of people. Psychologists wanting to enter the field of psychotherapy; pastoral and youth workers wanting to develop their humanistic skills and practice; lay people wanting to help or understand those with 'problems' - all could get something from Rogers. The history and focus of Carl Roger’s work was one of the reasons why he has been so attractive to successive generations of counsellors this was a language to which they could relate. The themes and concerns he developed seemingly had a direct relevance to their work with troubled individuals. Rogers’s popularity with those providing counselling training (at various levels) opened up his work to large numbers of workers. Understanding what today we call………….. The Person-Centred Approach: Main tenets and philosophies. The person-centred approach was developed from the concepts of humanistic psychology. The humanistic approach “views people as capable and autonomous, with the ability to resolve their difficulties, realise their potential, and change their lives in positive ways” (Seligman, 2006). Carl Rogers (a major contributor of the client-centred approach) emphasised the humanistic perspective as well as ensuring therapeutic relationships with clients to promote self-esteem, authenticity and actualisation in their life, and help them to use their strengths (Seligman, 2006). The person-centred approach was originally focused on the client being in charge of the therapy which led to the client developing a greater understanding of self, self-exploration, and improved self-concepts. The focus then shifted to the client’s frame of reference and the core conditions required for successful therapy such as ensuring the therapist demonstrates empathic understanding in a non-judgemental way. Currently, the person-centred approach focuses on the client being able to develop a greater understanding of self in an environment which allows the client to resolve his or her own problems without direct intervention by the therapist. The therapist should keep a questioning stance which is open to change as well as demonstrating courage to face the unknown. Rogers also emphasized the attitudes and personal characteristics of the therapist and the quality of the client-therapist relationship as being the determinants for a successful therapeutic process (Corey, 2005). Key Concepts The humanistic influence on person-centred therapy – As previously mentioned, the humanistic approach has been a major influence on person-centred therapy. Person-centred therapists believe that clients are capable and trustworthy and they focus on clients’ ability to make changes for themselves. Actualisation – People have the tendency to work towards self-actualisation. Self-actualisation refers to developing in a complete way. It occurs throughout the lifespan as the individual works towards “intrinsic goals, self-realization and fulfilment, involving autonomy and self-regulation” (Seligman, 2006). Carl Rogers was, if nothing else, optimistic in his belief in his fellow human beings, and that is all humans. He was convinced from his early studies in the 50’s right through to his end papers that we all had the capacity for personal growth and development and it really was this strong belief in our abilities to realise our potentials that he postulated the actualising tendency, Rogers said that for this actualising tendency to work at its best “we have to have a feeling of need” but here is I suppose the key, clients in therapy feel such that any positive thoughts are usually not possible, which leads on to what I said earlier, that for any benefit to arise then the client needs to have complete faith in the counsellor to appreciate through the clients eyes their problems. Conditions of worth – Conditions of worth influence the way in which a person’s self-concept is shaped from important people in his or her life. Conditions of worth refer to judgemental and critical messages from important people that influence the way the individual acts and reacts to certain situations. When an individual has conditions of worth imposed on him or her, self-image is often low. Also, if the individual is exposed to overprotective or dominating environments, this can also have a negative impact on self-image (Seligman, 2006). Issues arise when over time individuals develop a self concept based on perceptions of what others expect of us and as such we adopt those concepts and perceptions as being goals for us to achieve when in actuality an individual should be striving for what they want, what they feel happy what they want in their inner self, or what they feel are their orgasmic values. As it is society that give people their perceptions of worth, especially parents then it is not to surprising that example of what they feel are things like, “you are only worthwhile if you are pleasing people” or you are only worthwhile if you have no comment. It is therefore not surprising that internal conflicts arise when pleasing others is not necessarily what the individual wants. Rogers appreciated this and said that if we recognised what we wanted as more important and we had confidence in our beliefs then this process of regarding ourselves would eliminate the stress caused by conditions of worth inflicted upon us and as such we started to achieve the target of being true to our self. Congruence – So, as I have discussed previously, it is essential that the counsellor or facilitator is as genuine and as transparent as possible and that this attitude is conveyed to the client in an honest way with integrity. Being congruent shows the client that it is really ok to be in touch and responsive with their inner thoughts and feelings and that it ok to share these with the counsellor. The fully functioning person -The fully functioning person is an individual who has “ideal emotional health” (Seligman, 2006). Generally, the fully functioning person will be open to experience, lives with a sense of meaning and purpose, and trusts in self and others. One of the main goals of person-centred therapy is to work towards becoming “fully functioning” One of the reasons people require assistance is that they can not work towards those goals. Phenomenological perspective – The phenomenological approach refers to the unique perception by each individual of his or her own world. The individual experiences and perceives own world and reacts in an individual way. Person-centred therapy focuses on the individual’s own experience informing how treatment will work. Unconditional Positive regard – Carl Rogers said that he regarded congruence as his first ideal in a person centred relationship He then echoed that his second requirement was unconditional positive regard which required the counsellor to appreciate the client positively without any condition attached, though not requiring the counsellor to condone the actions of the client but to accept the client as a worthwhile person when occasionally his demeanour and behaviour may not be. By demonstrating this the counsellor can state his acceptance of the client and conversely demonstrate that the client has a safe non judgemental atmosphere to work within, an environment where he or she can investigate thoughts and actions which the client may have regarded as shameful or embarrassing and as such never explored before. There are a number of general ideas about personality development with regard to person-centred therapy. Basically, person-centred therapy states that personality can be fully actualised when the individual is exposed to unconditional positive regard. An individual who has been exposed to conditional positive regard can have low self-esteem and low feelings of worth. An individual who is self-actualised will be more open to experience and less defensive, will learn to live in the moment, will trust own decision-making skills, will have more life choices and be more creative. Empathy – In the Person centred approach, Rogers said that empathy was the “cornerstone” the “bedrock” to which this therapy is underpinned. Empathy simply requires the counsellor to be able to enter into the “frame of reference” of the client. To simply see and appreciate what the client is seeing and experiencing but done in a way which does not involve the counsellor leaving their own sense of “self”, to stay within there own frame work. Simply put, empathy allows the counsellor to understand the situation a client finds themselves in as if the counsellor was the client. Rogers said that established empathy will allow the client to discover, question and explore any issues they may raise and so to bring about change. Rogers said (Away of Being 1980) “We think we listen but very rarely do we listen with understanding and true empathy. If we did then this very special form of listening is special and one of the most potent forces for change A person Centred Approach in relation to Gestalts and TA………Theses models mentioned previously in contrast to the person centred approach share some basic assumptions and all three are radically different from Freud’s initial direct approach. All three work with the individual as a whole and not as early psychoanalysts did with direct interventionist methods. The concept believes that a person needs to find who they are and where are in the here and now, but that is also the very basis of Gestalt isn’t it and also the goal of the TA therapist. People need to look on how their words and actions represent their real selves in this world are what make these approaches share the fundamental concepts of being honest with ones self and with others…………not easy is it! In reflecting on the Roger’s model I have attempted to put it into practice and use counselling skills based on his approach in a taped example…. Using counselling skills Counselling skills sessions should be centred on three stages, they are 1) The Opening Stage 2) The Middle Stage. 3) The Closing Stage The opening stage is probably the most important. It sets the tone for the rest of the session. It should enable a climate of security for the speaker, enable freedom to express and give time to develop at their own pace. It also sets some boundaries to which both speaker and listener can understand and accept. It should engender initial feelings of congruence, demonstrate fledgling roots of empathy, put simply it should be a time when the speaker starts to feel at ease. Stage One. Outcomes from tape From the onset of the tape I adopt a visual approach, using the hands expressively which I was not conscious of and a “laid” back style which I hope remains with me. I certainly felt comfortable and hoped that this was being conveyed to the speaker. It did seem to assist the listener to relax because when I introduced myself I got good response from the speaker who accepted all that I explained. A point here though, I did not emphasise enough the expected length of the session and have made a note to change slightly my initial introduction. This phase took about 4 minutes and further more the speaker responded positively to all points and was happy to proceed. I felt at this stage of the proceedings a good sense of congruence was being enjoyed. It “felt” as if it was happening. The skills which could be used in a session Attentiveness and Rapport: It is essential to ensure that the speaker feels that I was with them on every thing they said, that I was alert to their comments and feelings and I was actually listening. It reduces the need to ask or be forced to ask direct questions to check on things that may have been missed by lack of concentration. It also demonstrates that if only for that 30 mins or so I am “theirs”, a person who does care. By being attentive the listener can respond to emotions and feelings from the speaker, simple provision of a glass of water or a box of tissues demonstrates the listener as a responsive person. Tape Example: At one point I reflected back to the speaker “You say you don’t want to get back at them” I did this because the speaker had used it three times in as many minutes and with venom. Then they followed up by refereeing to “a need for getting revenge” The speaker leant forward and said “yes your right I keep getting it mixed. What I actually mean is…….and followed it with a laugh. Active Listening including minimal encouragers By active listening the listener can gauge when a response may be needed and more importantly ensure that the response is correct for that moment. Staying within the speakers personal frame work can only ensure interventions be it clarification or gentle nudges are the correct ones, appropriate to what is actually being said and not from assumptions of what is possibly being meant. The session is about the speaker, what they say, what they feel and what they emote and its that what we want to hear. The less interference from the listener other than acknowledgements, encouragement by nods, hand gestures and simple” yes” or “no” the better it is for the speaker. Tape example During early stages of the tape the speaker refers to an issue which she said troubled her. She gave several examples of what ‘it’ may be but was but nothing specific She referred to a time more than any single one event using the word “it” to define what ever it was. After several instances of the word “it” at a pause I leant forward and said using hand language as well, “you say it….it being”' ..pause” the response was a very clear definition of exactly what “it” was to her. Managing Silence It is important for the listener to appreciate the difference between a meaningful pause and a silence as the silence may have to be managed to get the speaker back on track. There is no rule of thumb to this, but if the listener is with the speaker, watching, sensing, listening attentively in most instances a pause can normally be seen as the speaker is reflecting in on themselves on what they have said and deciding on what if any thing they want to say now. Usually they do proceed even if a gentle nudge is needed. The silence at first happening may give cause for alarm. It may be that the speaker has had enough or just gone quiet with no one thing to lead them on again. It may be many other things, horror of what they have said or are feeling. Whatever it is, its silence and it may last several seconds or many seconds. The listener if attentive to what has been said prior should have some idea what the reason is or may be. It’s important that the listener does not blunder in too soon, panicking that the speaker has dried up, lost interest etc. It’s important that the speaker is not over faced with a direct question or inappropriate reflection. It may be that a gentle reassurance is all that is needed to enable the speaker to reconnect with the session. The key is that the silence means something to the speaker. The listener has to judge the best intervention and when best to say it, if at all. Tape Example In the tape session my first real sticky moment came after 10 minutes when the speaker dried up. I remember her gesticulating that she was out of ideas, could not think (did not want to think') not sure etc and looking away……..she kept looking away for well over ten seconds but when she looked up I came back with “Its ok, we have plenty of time I sense though you have had something flash into your head then”. The answer was yes….and a very long pause (5 secs ') The speaker who at all times kept starring at me maintaining eye contact (which was not easy!) but she seemed deep in thought on some thing. The speaker after much humming and erring suddenly launched into dialogue again. I was happy with the long pause. It seemed natural and at no time did it feel awkward. Empathetic Listening Empathic listening (sometimes called active listening or reflective listening) is a way of listening and responding to another person that improves mutual understanding and trust. It is an essential skill for the listener as it enables the listener to receive and accurately interpret the speaker's message and then provide an appropriate response. The response as I have referred to in the above section in managing silence is an example and it is an integral part of the listening process and can be critical to the success of the session Tape Example An example on the tape proved actually pivotal in the speakers comments. The issue being shared though at this stage not fully explained kept getting a post script when it cropped up. Three times over about five mins the speaker said “…”but its not a problem, I have forgotten about it now” After the third of these comments I interjected and said “ “I hear you saying that but I was sensing you have not really forgotten the incident” It seemed a natural interjection and it got a super response with much emotion and much angst. The speaker responded with a dejected “yes” I have forgotten the incident but then went on to state just the opposite, admitted it was an issue and gave much more information laced with emotion and voice level changes and actually told me what the problem was. Effective Questioning In a PC counselling session it is about the speaker giving by explanations, comment and observation their own issues in their own words. The input from the listener though supportive and attentive needs to be non directional where possible. However the need for listener understanding may mean clarification is needed on the points said. Using open-ended questions for example during a session encourages a speaker to provide more information to the listener. Open-ended or non directional questions allow the speaker to only respond in complete sentences. When answering in an open-ended question format, a speaker will generally disclose deeper information that includes feelings, thoughts, attitudes and understanding of the subject being discussed. These questions can help the listener and speaker work through the session as it develops by discovering any ‘flawed’ beliefs or unresolved feelings which the speaker may in the first instance not discuss. Close-ended questions should be avoided during a session as they do not allow a speaker to expand on statements or provide deeper information about themselves. Often they solicit simple answers of “yes” or “no”. Close-ended questions can be useful for listeners when speakers may be wandering between thoughts, being random in the content and relevance. In hypnotherapy for example, it is often referred to that the speakers are experiencing loose associations. Loose associations occur when a speaker cannot logically connect one thought to the next. It’s not exclusive to hypnotherapy, we all have the ability to day dream, to drift away from the present, speakers often do.. Close-ended questions can therefore can act as a tool for bringing the speaker back to the present and reduce the chance of responding with loose associations. It is essential that the empathic and active listening in the session is as good as it can be as close ended, direct questions need to be kept to an absolute minimal. Tape Example I tried through my session to avoid direct questions and rely on open questions in the form of a statement. The speaker often gave examples of one thing then said the other. In one instance the speaker reiterated that things where getting better but followed each sentence with a pause and a look of anger. I prompted the speaker on the third instance by going back on what the speaker had said I reiterated to her that she had said several times that she was controlling the situation. After a pause I said “I hear you telling me this but I sensed you are only just controlling your anger and frustration each time you say it”………..an open question/statement. The speaker partly clarified it and I came back again saying” that she seemed to be unsure of herself each time she said it”………speaker agreed. She went to say that anger was a good word. Paraphrasing and Summarising Paraphrasing is handy in a listening skills session and it allows a listener to summarise a speakers statement and to demonstrate that they where actively listening. As a questioning technique, paraphrasing is or should be very effective as it gives the speaker an opportunity to clarify any information that may have been missed by the listener. Paraphrasing also encourages the listener to expand and add to any previous statements they have said as it allows them to reflect on information they have relayed and add to it if necessary even if they don’t initially appreciate that is what the listener is trying to do or what the listener wants Tape Example My tape session was for 15 minutes full of speaker ambiguities, say one thing, then in the next breath say the opposite. The speaker used the saying “I feel they needed to “know” she said this several times usually after describing some thing else, on the last instance I reflected it straight back by paraphrasing and used the words “you say you feel they need to know” pause, I coupled this with some open arms and hand gestures which indicated to the speaker that I really had heard the speaker but wanted to know why they( whoever they where) needed to know. Along with the question the speaker visibly relaxed and clarified what she meant. At the end of the session I summarised several of these instances of reflections and paraphrasing. After each one I said “ I think that’s what I understand you said, would you agree. I found this prompted the speaker to sum up as well some of the issues covered and even add a little extra detail. In one instance she said, “Oh yes that’s right, but did I tell you also about…..” Focusing Focusing in counselling or in speaker/listener relationship can assist speakers to make the best use of their time in session. This also can be said for the listener. By focusing on the issues being spoken the listener not only gives the speaker every possible opportunity to ‘open up’ but ensures that the time spent together is as efficient and productive as is possible. Focusing by the listener allows for all subtleties of the speaker’s thinking and feelings. Tape Example Through out the tape I did keep the focus on the issues raised without allowing for digression but in one instance the speaker started to talk about what her brother would have done about “it”. This was when I was pressing for whatever “it” was, I said to the speaker “I hear what you’re saying about your brother but are you telling me this is how you see “it”. By doing this it refocused the speaker back on to her self. Focusing as I found out, can be tiring! In closing the session I let my focus slip from what I was trying to do, that being sum up and close, I actually said “Time is running out and I would like for myself and also for you to just recap on what we have covered, is that ok” I was happy that I covered the major topics spoken, used examples without questioning and got the speaker to agree with my recollections. I did let the session reopen itself two or three times as the speaker came back with some comment following my recapping and I did not close it down there and then but allowed a few more comments. Though the speaker was focusing again on her I let the session slip a little from my control Immediacy From a speaker’s point of view, Immediacy can be simply put. It invites the speaker to look at what is happening between the two of them as it is actually happening. It focuses on the ‘here and now’ and involves the very moment that a ‘moment’ happens. It clarifies what is going on between speaker and listener. It puts it into words. From a listener’s point of view it involves revealing your immediate feelings (in relation to the speaker), sharing maybe a hunch, an idea or a sense of what the speaker may be feeling and invites the speaker to explore. Working at an appropriate pace The amount of time a PC counsellor may allocate to a problem often differs from the approach and expectancies of other practitioners. There is no particular hard or fast rule. At the core of all therapeutic models is the speaker along with the listener. They both have some expectancies even if for one of them it may be failure! However the listener needs to be aware exactly of what is being said or not and maintain a steady pace which mirrors the revelation level of the speaker. Maybe after five or six sessions things may seem to be not progressing and that is time to take stock, take stock together. However to ensure that the sessions are meaningful, the listener has to be mindful of what the speaker is saying ensuring that reflection and questioning are natural but not hurried. The environment that this creates assists with congruence, empathy and a general feeling of well being by the speaker. Oh and the listener as well!. Checking understanding with the speaker The saying “If you wander up a dark garden path at night you may not see the banana skin under foot” (Morrisey R. 2009. IAPH National Conference) is relevant and pertinent to counselling as well. As the speaker gives out the listener interpolates, reflection and paraphrasing assist but should a paradox used as an example or a homily shared with the listener be misunderstood then a wholly inappropriate response by the speaker might damage the very progress that the duo may have made. It can demonstrate to some the listener is not listening, that the speaker may not have empathy and that the closely developed situation may stall…all for not checking exactly what you have heard! Closing the Session. The Importance. The end of a session is as relevant as the beginning. May be more so. When the listener began I started by defining what was going to happen. How I hoped the speakers needs may be addressed and it was important to ensure and encourage the speaker. So in closing its just as important to ensure that the session impacts on that speaker as much as is possible. Potential benefits and outcomes can be discussed by allowing the listener to sum up what has been said and inferred. It allows the speaker a chance to reflect on what was said and should clearly demonstrate that the listener was being attentive to what was being said and it reinforces to the speaker that if nothing else, the last 30 mins or so has been their time and time that hopefully will feel productive. Should the speaker be emotional from the session the closing stage allows for some measure of comfort to be given and facilitate a atmosphere or composure. It allows time for the speaker to indicate if they want to continue in the future and it gives scope for the listener to encourage by agreeing to meet again Diversity. Possible impact on a skills session If all people were alike we would not need this topic but in an increasingly diverse nation where cultures are mixing more and more into the same living areas, it is vital to appreciate this issue. Besides culture increasing exposure to different sexual orientations should be accepted, if not by the counsellor themselves they should be able to disavow themselves from any personal opinion and see the speaker as an individual alone and respect the human as they would I hope expect to be accepted themselves This is probably true of other countries as well, but we cannot truly help everyone until we recognise that cultural and language diversity affects the way people need to be counseled. It is important to "help” clients to understand/maintain/resolve their own social and cultural identification; and understand the interaction of culture, gender, and sexual orientation on their behavior and needs. This is a lot of words that basically state that listeners need to recognise the many issues of diversity, and help their clients within the context of their own self-identified culture. Accept the individual, don’t judge the person.