Online_Fathering__the_Experience_of_First_Time_Fatherhood_in_Combat_Deployed_Troops

Online Fathering: The Experience of First-Time Fatherhood in Combat-Deployed Troops Grand Canyon University Introduction to Nursing Research March 20, 2011 Online Fathering: The Experience of First-Time Fatherhood in Combat-Deployed Troops Most fathers participate, or at least attend, the births of their children. In this society, it is typically expected that fathers will go to childbirth classes, doctor appointments, and be in the delivery room to comfort and support their wife/partner. During the last 20 years our country has been deeply involved in the wars of other countries. Thousands of men who are expecting their first child are deployed to combat zones every year. These men offer a unique perspective into the transition to fatherhood. Nurses working with military families need to understand this difficult situation in order to facilitate improved communication between both parents. Nurses who are also deployed can be quite helpful in supporting and preparing men for their new role as fathers. Study Design The method used for this qualitative study is descriptive phenomenological. This seemed to be the best method because the focus is on the actual experiences of the participants from their own perspectives. Sample The sample consisted of 17 men who had returned from deployment to combat zones in the Middle East within the previous month. All participants were married and reported the birth of their first child while they were gone. Deployment time ranged from 6 to 10 months. At the time they returned home, the babies were 2 to 6 months old. The mean age of the participants was 23 years. 10 were Caucasian, 4 African-American, 2 Hispanic, and 1 “other”. Procedure Open ended interviews were done at the home of each participant. They were asked “What is it like to become a father while deployed overseas to a combat region'”. They were only asked additional questions for clarification of the information given. The interviews were audiotaped. Field notes were done just after each interview. The audiotapes and notes were transcribed within 72 hours after the interview. Data Analysis During analysis 182 significant phrases and statements were extracted. Each phrase or statement was studied to formulate a meaning. Those meanings were then arranged into clusters of themes with common meanings. Main theme 1 is “Disruption of Protector/Provider Role”, with the sub-themes “Worry: A traumatic and lonely childbirth”, “Lost opportunity”, “Guilt: An absent father”, and “Fear of death and dismemberment: Who will be the father'”. Main theme 2 is “Restoration of the Protector/Provider Role”, with the sub-theme “Communication: The ties that bind”. Findings Main Theme 1: Disruption of Protector/Provider Role One of the main concerns of the participants was the feeling of not living up to expectations. They felt obligated to protect and provide for their families but were unable to do so because of their absence. “Worry: A traumatic and lonely childbirth” In the weeks prior to delivery, the participants reported feeling worried about the safety of their wives and babies. They imagined that something would go very wrong during delivery. The scene would deteriorate into chaos and bloodshed. They wanted to be the one to restore order in that dangerous situation. Most of the mothers had planned for a support person to be with them during delivery but the fathers were unsure about that person’s ability to advocate for the needs of the mother. Unpredictable and sporadic access to means of communication caused excessive worry and anxiety. “Lost opportunity” Before deployment the participants expected to be actively involved in the delivery, bonding with their baby, and starting a new family life. They regretted being absent for this important life change. They worried about being unable to bond with the baby at a later time. They also worried about the baby not knowing who they are and rejecting them. Missing the delivery was considered to be a lost opportunity. “Guilt: An absent father” The feelings of guilt came from three different sources. First, the men felt as though they had chosen their careers over their family obligations. Most of the men had no choice in being deployed but a few had sought out deployment opportunities as a way to earn more money or increase promotion potential. They felt conflict between duty to their career and duty to their family. Second, the participants felt guilty for reliance on friends or family members for monetary or emotional support. They felt as though that reliance diminished their paternal role. Again, they had failed to live up to expectations. And third, the participants felt guilty for not always thinking about their families. According to one man, “thoughts of family life distracted from situational awareness of the combat environment” and could endanger themselves and others. The unpredictable exposure to intense danger diminished awareness of a life that was going on without them. “Fear of death and dismemberment: Who will be the father'” All of the participants worried about not going home. Death was a very real threat. Their fear was that in death, they would be abandoning their family who would then struggle to survive. A few of the men worried about being replaced if they died. They also worried about being seriously injured. Some thought that major disability would be worse than death. Being disabled would mean dependence on others, an inability to support the family, and possibly being unable to properly raise a child. Main Theme 2: Restoration of the protector/provider role “Communication: The ties that bind” As the due date approached, frequent communication relieved anxiety by reassuring the men that everything was going well. They generally learned about the delivery by e-mail or by phone. E-mail was most commonly used but participants also used instant messaging, Facebook or MySpace, and sometimes You Tube for videos of the babies. Communication was essential for helping the fathers be involved with both mundane daily activities and important decisions. One man thought that extensive communication had better prepared him for the return home. Summary The participants of this study all felt that their absence during the birth and first few months of their child’s life disrupted their primary role as protector and provider. None of the men had ever seen a delivery and several of them envisioned gory, near-death childbirth scenarios, causing great worry. This may be from a knowledge deficit or from continuous exposure to a combat environment. All of the participants reported a sense of loss for missing the birth of the first child. They felt that they had missed an opportunity to bond with the child. The men all felt guilty for being absent because they chose the career that took them away, because their families had to rely on others, and because their thoughts were often on the situation they were in and not on the family. All of the men worried about being killed or seriously injured and being unable to support the family. Some of the men avoided risky situations when possible and took more precautions for their safety. The participants attempted to fulfill their role as responsible fathers through frequent long distance communication with their wives. This helped them to feel like a contributing partner in spite of the geographical separation. Implications for Nurses Military nurses, particularly those deployed to combat zones, have a unique opportunity in assisting these men. In a chaotic combat environment, the feelings of expectant and new fathers are likely to be overlooked. Many military men are hesitant to seek help for mental health issues and nurses need to be proactive in assessing psychological wellness. Much of the men’s anxiety and distress could be relieved through communication with their spouse. Nurses can help to facilitate that communication. Understanding this experience helps nurses support and prepare these men despite the limitations of a stressful combat environment. Reference Schachman, K. A. (2010). Online fathering: The experience of first-time fatherhood in combat-deployed troops. Nursing Research, 59, 11-17. Retrieved from http://www.nursing-research-editor.com/ on March 18, 2011