Lessons_of_Morrie

Lessons of Morrie Corey Shambach Pennsylvania College of Technology Twelve years ago a well- known Detroit sports- writer Mitch Albom published a bestseller about an old friend and favorite professor, Morrie Schwartz. They had fallen out of touch due to Mitch’s demanding job and life. By a slim chance of fate, one night Mitch was switching through the TV channels and came across Ted Koppel, of Nightline, interviewing Morrie . Unbeknownst to Mitch, Morrie was now dying of amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS). In Mitch’s college days, Morrie was one of his mentors. It took the fact that Morrie was dying of ALS for Mitch to pick up the phone and become reacquainted with his old professor Morrie nicknamed “coach.” The conversation lead to Mitch now commuting every Tuesday from Detroit to New England to be the last student Morrie would ever have. Morrie was teaching Mitch lessons about life from a dying man’s perspective. Mitch recorded the last months of Morrie’s life while he was deteriorating from the deadly disease ALS. This experience made Mitch revaluate his own life and change his life forever. As a result of that experience, Albom went onto lay out less than two hundred pages, the life lessons such as loving and forgiving that could enrich anyone’s life. The fatal disease ALS also became known as Lou Gehrig’s disease after Gehrig, a famous New York Yankee was diagnosed with this disease in 1939. Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis is “a progressive neurodegenerative disease [that] annually affects 30,000 people in the United States” (Wosk, 2006, p. 78). This means tens of thousands of Americans must deal with pain and frustration from this deteriorating disease annually. Some of the common symptoms are “weakness and fasciculations in any muscle or group of muscles” (Boyle & Ciuca p. 66). This means failing muscles and muscle spasms.“The disease may affect upper limbs and cause wasting or weakness of the intrinsic muscles of the hand” (Boyle & Ciuca, 1976, p. 66). This means loss of you upper extremities and movement of your hands. What makes this disease different from a lot of other diseases is the patient’s mind is alert until death. On the average, patients live about four years, but those who’s ALS commences with bulbar palsy die within a year (Boyle & Rudy, 1976, p. 66). This means people that have the typical type nerve damaging disease ALS live about four years and the people that have the disease of the type that affects the tongue and swallowing die within a year. One of the books most insightful lessons for me involved Morrie’s approach to being able to detach from his feelings. Morrie talks about washing yourself with emotions. So you do not fear them anymore. This way they cannot control you as long as you keep them in perspective. Then you can become at peace with it by bringing the emotions out and then putting them away at will. I am currently experiencing detaching in my own life due to my mother’s condition. She is suffering from dementia and Alzheimer’s disease and sometimes detaching is the only way to handle it, I always seemed to be in denial about my mother’s disease. I realize her condition exists and have thought about the implications of it. Knowing there is nothing I can do to change the situation I have decided not to worry about it and to take things as they come. One evening I called my mother from my job to check in on her. She told me there was a man and a woman there who wanted to take her away. They told her they would be back tomorrow. She told me firmly she was not going anywhere. Months earlier my sister who lived with my mother got her in trouble by having her cosign a loan. Because of this my mother fell under a guardianship (people who managed my mother’s affairs). Little did I know that day, my sister, got arrested for crack cocaine while she was living with my mom. That night when I got home I got a call from the lady at the guardianship. She said tomorrow we are coming to take your mother to a nursing home becaus your sister is in jail and she can no longer live there by herself. I pleaded with her not to do this, but I could do nothing. My mother’s future was out of my control. The next day I stayed home from work. I did not want to see my mother go through this alone. I knew this was not going to be easy becaus my mother would fight this the whole way through. They came that morning, armed with a State policeman parked out front and a medic. The lady from the guardianship came to my mother’s front door and introduced herself as Sara and My mother let her in. Then she started telling my mom she had to go to a nursing home. My mom was coherent enough to know what a nursing home was and there was no way she was going to one without a fight. I was also bitter about the whole situation, but as I said, there was nothing I could do. I got stuck in the middle of this and had to plead with my mother to go to the nursing home. My mother begged me to call my brother, but little did she know he could not do anything for her either. She cried and said. “I will never leave the stove on again”. This was so hard for me that it brought tears to my eyes. She was still determined not to go and all I could do is keep pleading with her. Sara told me the only other alternative was to bring the medic in and sedate her. I could not le this happen so,I told my mother we were going for a ride and she had to come along. During the trip to the nursing home my mother keep saying how beautiful the flowers were and how nice a day it was. She had no idea how her life was about to change forever. When we got there I had to beg her to stay, and had to convince her that I would be back tomorrow to bring her home. All the way home I cried because I knew my mother was never coming home again. I felt like just stopping at the top of the mountain and screaming my lungs out. I guess this was my moment to experience it all and learn how to detach myself from my feeling. This was one of the saddest days of my life. Just like Morrie said you have to let all of your emotions out, not hold back, and experience it to the fullest. I still cry about it but I know what to expect and how to let it go now. Another lesson Morrie spoke about was forgiveness. He talks about his friend knowing of his wife’s surgery, and never contacting them to see how she was doing. He acknowledged that he never let his friend reconcile with him even after many years. Now on his death bed Morrie is sorry that he did not resolve this with his friend. I have had something similar to this happen in my life and I am still working on reconciling. Seven years ago on the day before Black Friday I went looking for some money I had stashed. It was hidden in an old wallet in a nightstand by my bed. When I opened the wallet much to my amazement, there was only one hundred dollars in it. I knew for a fact I had three hundred and fifty dollars in it. My first thought was that maybe I took some money out and forgot. The more I thought about it the more I knew this was not what happened. What puzzled me was if somebody stole it, then why didn’t they take it all. The only suspect that first came into my mind was my sister. She knew I left my doors unlocked and that gave her the opportunity to come in and steal it. I felt guilty about suspecting my sister, but she was the likeliest suspect. If it would have been anybody else they would have taken all the money, besides, I heard she was getting back into the drugs again and this really raised my suspicions. At this point I was really upset so I went to my mother’s house to confront her. She lived with my mother, who I did not want to get my mother distressed. Upon arrival at the house I was still really pissed, so I waited for awhile before I went in. Upon entering I ask her to step outside. After a few seconds of hesitation she complied. I looked her right in the eyes and said “you stole my money didn’t you.” She just kept denying it over and over again. When I looked in her eyes and ask her again I knew it was useless. I might as well have been talking to the wall. At one time I know she would have never done this to me now it was just like she had no feelings at all. She was all strung out on crack and the only thing that concerned her was where she was going to get her next hit. I just turned around and went home I knew I was not going to get a confession from her. I gave up on my sister completely that day. A year later she went to jail for selling crack and is still there till this day. She writes me letters every week now from prison trying to reestablish our relationship. She has not admitted to stealing my money, but I know she did. The one lesson that Morrie talked about having the chance to reconcile and forgive his friend, but he did not. I am not going to let this eat at me the rest of my life. I have to forgive my sister and move on with my life. I do not want to end up on my death bed sorry that I never forgave her. Consequently I only used two points from Morrie. They were the points that were pertinent to my situations. andTuesdays with Morrie written by Mitch Albom. has a lot of bumps along the road and you should do everything to make your life easier.Although the two illustrations I used in my prior paragraphs supports the reasons anybody should read the book Tuesdays with Morrie written by Mitch Albom. You have to learn to let go and not dwell all the things in life that can bring you down. Detaching and forgiving are the two lessons I used to enrich and make my life happier. References Boyle, M. A., & Ciuca, R. L. (1976). Amyotrphic lateral sclerosis. American Journal of      Nursing, 76(1), 66-68. Wosk, G. (2006, November). The als association's first two decades. The Exceptional      Parent, 36, 77-79