Dykeman_Article

One would think that divorce on children does not have as great of an effect as it does, but according to the dykeman article it does. The effects can range from anywhere to whether you are a child or even adolescent to adulthood. In society today, most divorces will happen before the child or children are eighteen. Divorce has many factors, including before the divorce and after. The way the parents act with each other before and after the divorce plays a major role also. In the United States there are more than one third of children that will experiment divorce and its effects before adulthood and the consequences are immediate and long-lasting. There are more than one million divorces that happen every year. It has become as frequent as one can get in the American society. The effects on children can range anywhere from the child’s age, sex of the child, and even the conflict within the family. One has to be careful about bad mouthing one another in front of the child before and after the divorce because this can be strenuous on the child. If a child is a result of divorce he or she may do badly in school. This can be the result of a divorce or a divorce in progress (Dykeman B.F. (2003) The effects of family conflict resolution on children’s classroom behavior. Journal of Instructional Psychology, 30(1), p. 41) It can be somewhat difficult to separate the effects of divorce from the effects of a conflictual family. The negative effects of divorce may stem from pre-existing differences in the family prior to the divorce itself. A child of divorce may have a more difficult time with academic and social expectations at school rather than children that come from intact families or established or single-parent or blended families. Children can show limited effects over time due to divorce. The emotional aspects of divorce in a child can result in feelings of anxiety, Dykeman Article 3 depression, guilt, and sometimes aggression (Dykeman B.F. (2003) The effects of family conflict resolution on children’s classroom behavior. Journal of Instructional Psychology, 30(1), p. 41) With each passing year the divorce rate rises. It has risen two percent in the last ten years. The number of children that are affected yearly are under sixteen are one hundred and sixty-three thousand. Sixty-six of this percent are children that are under the age of eleven. “By the time a child is sixteen years old, one in four children are more likely to have been through a divorce with their parents (Hawkins p. 18). Divorce has an effect on everyone involved not just the children, but the two that are divorcing also. Half of the children that are born each year will see their parents before they turn eighteen. Some of these children might be so little that one might not remember. The ones that do remember are the ones that it can impact. Some divorces affect the children immediately and then slowly decline, but others may not show any result until years later (http://www.exampleessays.com/viewpaper/7856.html) Divorce is an intensely stressful experience for all children including the adults divorcing. Most children are not prepared for this type of grief at such an early age. In the preschool years which is ages 3-5 these children tend to show aggression and sleep disturbances and fear of separation from the missing parent. There is a great of yearning for the non-custodial parent. At the ages of six and a half to eight, which is called the latency stage these children will often openly grieve for the missing parent. They have fantasies that the non-custodial parent will reunite in the future. Children in this stage have a difficult time with the concept of the permanence of the divorce. At the ages of eight through eleven, which is called the late latency stage these children show anger and a feeling of powerlessness. They will also show grief in this Dykeman Article 4 stage due to the loss of the intact family. There is a possibility that the child may label the good and the bad parent in this stage. They also may take care of the parent at the expense of their own needs. At the ages of twelve through eighteen these young adults are prone to responding to their parents’ divorce with depression, suicidal ideation, and sometimes violent acting out episodes. These children tend to focus on the moral issues surrounding the divorce and will often judge their parents decisions and actions. Many adolescents will become anxious and fearful about their own future love and martial relationships. This age group has the capability to perceive integrity in the post-divorce relationship of their parents and show compassion for their parents without neglecting their own needs (http://www.childadvocate.net/divorce_effects_on_children.htm) Divorce on a child cannot just affect them at any age; it can affect their behavior, schoolwork, employment, relationships and future marriages. A key factor in how the child will take the divorce can depend on how well the adults deal with the child’s concerns, fears, questions and anxieties. Depending on the relationship with the child it can depend on how well the child takes it and if the child is closer to one parent over the other, he or she may take sides. A child of divorce will have to adapt to the possibility of a new school, having to relocate, new schedules, and adapt to the idea that both parents will not be around at the same time (http://www.exampleessays.com/viewpaper/7856.html) Although hundreds of thousands of people get married every year, the divorce rate is even greater. Statistically there are more divorces than there are marriages. If one decides to get married one ought to make sure that it is going to be for life. When two people get married it is Dykeman Article 5 suppose to be forever, but one cannot count on the twists and turns one might be thrown. If a child is brought into the mix it makes divorce that much harder. The older the child is, the more difficult it is going to be if the marriage ends in result. If one decides to marry he or she should make sure of all the consequences that can take place with or without a child. Marriage is a beautiful thing, but divorce is even more complicated than getting married. REFERENCES http://www.exampleessays.com/viewpaper/7856.html http://www.childadvocate.net/divorce_effects_on_children.htm Dykeman B. F. (2003) The effects of family conflict resolution on children’s classroom behavior. Journal of Instructional Psychology, 30(1), p. 41)