Diversity

Differences and Diversity The values and beliefs of the world’s religions and cultures are expressed in many ways through festivals and celebrations. Whether they relate to the seasons, living things or valued objects, they play a highly significant role in the lives of many children worldwide. This may be as part of their developing life in the family, the community and wider society, as well as nurturing their sense of identity, values and beliefs. Children are at a vulnerable risk in the early stages of their lives and adults have the power to affect and influence how children’s future beliefs and behaviour will develop (Pugh and Duffy, 2010). This is why children from separated families need added support through the different stages of their lives. Smith, Cowie and Blades (2003) support this as research evidence shows that conflict between parents can be distressing for children – whether it proceeds separation and divorce, or not. With this in mind, the purpose of this assignment is to focus on parents who have separated and how different settings support children with the possibility of two extended families and in contrast how other settings do the same. This assignment will also examine the theory of attachment and separation, current political and legal frameworks that impact parents who have separated and the different support networks that are available for parents and how these settings share this information. Diversity means difference and when used in a contrast or in addition to equality it is about recognising individuals, as well as group differences, by treating people as individuals and placing positive values on diversity in the community, work force and the early years (Macleod- Brudenell and Kay, 2008). The government says that it wants to make society and, in particular communities stronger, by getting people working together to run their own affairs and in July 2010, David Cameron launched a campaign called “The Big Society” with the hope to make society work more closely together. It aims to put more power and responsibility into the hands of families, groups, networks, neighbourhoods and locally-based communities, with the idea that all of these will take more action at a local level, with more freedom to do things the way they want (BBC, 2010). We are living in an ever growing diverse society and lives of people around us are all so different. In the early years sector, there are children from all over the world that attend settings with different cultural and heritage backgrounds from African, Indian, Chinese to Polish but also including children with English as an additional language, Downs Syndrome, autism, behavioural issues, or come from a travelling background. Childcare is a crucial element in separated parent’s lives. For many, finding and sustaining paid work is dependent on the availability of good childcare that is affordable and available at the times when they need it. The Government has made great efforts in childcare and early education provision. The Children Act 2006 (HMSO, 2006), was built on the Government’s Ten Year Childcare Strategy (HM, Treasury, 2004). This was to help improve the access for working parents and requires local authorities to access the local childcare market and ensure there is sufficient childcare for working parents through the availability of free nursery places for three and four year olds. Recent research on single parents (Gingerbread, 2010) has shown that since the 1970’s the percentage of single parents has risen. In 1971 just 8% of children were from single parent families, whereas in 1998, 24% were from single parent families. By 2011, this figure had increased to 26%. Today, figures have shown that single parent families have reached a high of two million, with almost 92% of women taking on the main caring responsibility (Beckford, 2012). Therefore, from these statistics it shows a growth in separation and divorce and there are more and more single parents raising their children alone. Whatever the situation, being in a single family is bound to have an effect on how the child is raised. Every individual family is unique and complex. Members of one separated family might differ widely from another and each person might have various aspects to their situation, which need to be understood together with the setting that the child attends. With this, gender, ethnicity, age, disability and childhood experience all interact and affect each other. Early years settings aim to maximise support for children from all sources including both parents and extended families. They also aim to actively promote co-operation and stability for children, challenge conflict, support both parents equally, ensure there are not too many changes for the children and be child centred. It is important that the ultimate aim is to ensure that the welfare of the child is accommodated. Sadek and Sadek (1996) explain that Maslow’s hierarchy of needs 1954 can indicate exactly what a child of any age, be it a toddler or teenager, needs. In order to succeed on each level a strong basis must be built on the lower levels. The pyramid shows a clear indication of the needs of young children, in order to be in a happy setting. Children coming from separated families may be less likely to progress higher up the levels of the pyramid if they do not fulfil stages including love and belongingness. This is why it is important for the different settings to work together to support not only the children but the parents in ensuring the children’s happiness. There are a variety of settings that children will attend throughout their lives. Each setting will have its own way of addressing the individual requirements of the child involved with parental separation. For instance, in a nursery setting they support separated families by having an assigned key person to the child. This enables the child to make a good attachment with a person in the setting that they attend. Dcsf (2008) indicates that a key person is someone with “special responsibilities for with a small number of children, giving them the reassurance to feel safe and cared for and building relationships with their parents”. They are also the people with whom children can express their feelings to and help them feel confident and safe within the setting. Therefore, young children may demonstrate their need to feel secure through clinging to their parent or key person or by being uncooperative with people they do not know well. They may protest when their parent or key person leaves them and show their distress by rejecting comfort or distraction, becoming aggressive or defiant or withdrawing and not engaging in activities. Though difficult to manage, these are ordinary ways in which children respond to separation and anxiety. In these situations, children benefit from having a key person who can accept their emotions and respond with understanding. In addition, nursery settings will also begin to help and explain to children what is happening in their family and why some parents may be behaving and feeling as they are. The key person will emphasise that it is not the child’s fault and that they cannot control adult decisions and that both their parents love them in the way they are able to. This can be supported through a number of different resources for example, the use of stories, such as “Two Homes”. This story explores how life changes for Alec, when his mum and dad no longer live together. Despite the fact that he now has two of everything, one thing stays the same, how much his mum and dad still love him. Stories can be used spontaneously through the use of observation. McGhee (2011) indicates the level of support that children receive from outside the family and the effects of separation on children and how they manage and adjust to divorce. Such support through early years settings is conducted through observation as well as care. The key person will observe the care parents give to their child, and will listen to ensure that the resident parent is not attempting to alienate the child from the non-resident parent, as this can been seen as a serious form of emotional abuse. In a primary or secondary school, staff will be aware of any child who has come from a broken family and will explore positive ways to ensure that the child is not disadvantaged. With careful observation in schools, any irregular behaviour will be noticed and appropriate action taken and, in conjunction with both parents, this should be identified at an early stage. As the children reach secondary school, they become far more independent and the school has less control over the children’s individual relationships with their parents; they will endeavour to maintain a close relationship with parents to ensure that the child makes good progress. However, as a school they have the duty to provide a service of support should the child wish to use it. This will include supporting them in understanding their own needs and suggesting ways in which they can communicate with their parents. For example, the child can ask their parents not to criticise the other parent in front of them, and can decline to be used as a go between. Many schools offer counselling for children in this situation and it is seen as an opportunity for a child to speak with someone in confidence. School nurses and parent support advisors may also offer addition assistance with parental relationships. Parents’ evenings are the opportunity for parents to hear about their children’s progress either in nursery or school and these settings must ensure that both parents, whatever the circumstance, feel able to attend and contribute. Generally, parents manage to come together for such events particularly if the child has on going contact with both parents. However, there may be situations where the level of conflict is so high that the parents do not want to be in the same place at the same time. Therefore, settings, where possible, will have some flexibility, and will allow parents to see the teachers/practitioners separately. In some settings where it would prove impractical to organise another meeting with the teachers/practitioners a meeting with the head teacher or setting manager would be arranged. Another support method to provide parents with equal opportunities of viewing their child’s progress would be through producing creative pieces of work for both parents, particularly at Christmas or other religious festivals such as Eid, Diwali or Easter. This enables each parent to be included in the festival celebrated. Anger, sadness, worry, relief, confusion, guilt, embarrassment, loneliness and nervousness are all common emotions that children experience when their parents separate. Many children have difficulty expressing these emotions. Therefore, it is important for both nursery settings and schools to support children in any way they can. From visiting different settings as a part of the research for this assignment, it was noted that preschool settings encourage children to explain their feelings through the use of drawings. This allowed the children to explain what it is that they see and for practitioners to gain a better understanding of what the children are emotionally experiencing. Attachment theory provides us with a useful model for understanding children’s development in the context of relationships (Bowlby, 1988). Bowlby attempted to understand the intense distress experienced by children who had been separated from their parents (Pound, 2005). Bowlby observed that children would go to extraordinary lengths to prevent times of separation from their parents or to re-establish closeness to a missing parent. His observations and theory can, therefore, be closely connected with parent separation. Nursery settings can also support the children with opportunities for them to express how they are feeling with the use of dolls or figures, writing or art, with the key person being mindful of the child’s feelings, as they may not be able to be as open with their parents for the fear of upsetting them (Miller and Pound 2011). Marriage is a highly significant form of attachment bond that has negative consequences when broken. As well as Bowlby, theorists such as Ainsworth, realised and supported the notion that as we grow older we form new attachments with multiple important figures throughout our lives (Pound, 2005). Unusual changes in behaviour are often observed in childcare when parents separate and the key person often has to deal with the situation. For example, one parent may have visiting rights at the weekend and spoils and overwhelms the child with special treats and outings. The setting may then receive a phone call from the other parent, frustrated with the change that has happened over the weekend and the difficulties involved in getting the child’s routine in place. In these situations, it is important for the key person to remain objective and not to take sides. The settings manager should attempt to talk to both parents individually and try to resolve the problem. Parenting problems after separation are often related to the reasons for ending the relationship, particularly in cases of domestic violence, rather than to whether the separation followed marriage or living together (Wade and Smart, 2002). Working together as parents is hard where there is conflict in a relationship and even harder after separation or divorce. Arranging contact between the children and the non-resident parent requires a sustained effort by both parents. Non-resident parents must accept that their role has changed from when they shared a home with the children. Parents who live with the child must accept that they need to actively facilitate contact arrangements, even if their own relationship with their former partner is not amicable. Contact can be so conflicted that it may need to sometimes be necessary for the parents to go their separate ways at least for a period of time. The impact of divorce on children can be severe, both emotionally and economically. Children who grow up in single parent families have a much greater risk of living in poverty than children who live with both parents. Even when parents have a steady income, it is more expensive to maintain two separate households than it is to maintain one. Every family will establish their own arrangements after separation. Therefore, settings must work with the parents and children equally to achieve a smooth transition. Macleod-Brudenell and Kay (2008) defines parental responsibility as, all the rights, duties, powers, responsibilities and authority which, by law, a parent of a child should have in relation to the child and their property. Parental responsibility means, therefore, that parents are recognised in the eyes of the law as having all the legal powers to make appropriate decisions in relation to the upbringing of their child. Until December 2003, when the law changed, a mother was automatically given parental responsibility. However, after this time, fathers of children who are present at the registration of their child were granted the same parental responsibility as the mother (Directgov, n.d.). This law supplemented the 1989 Children Act (HMSO, 1989), which was intended to emphasise parental responsibilities over rights and believed that arrangements which were best for the children could be made without things having to devolve into court actions. However, in February 2012, Kenneth Clarke, the Justice Secretary revealed plans to give separated and divorced fathers more rights (Mulholland, 2012) which will provide children of separated families the right to contact not only the mothers but fathers as well (Bradford, 2012). Considering the concerns about divorce and separation, over the years we have seen a growth in the range of support services which have been designed to help parents and children. There are many organisations such as “Divorce and Children” where, through sessions with a coach, information, practical advice and tips for separated and divorced parents are offered. These include how to manage and help their children successfully through the family changes. “Relate” is a national organisation for couples and families. It hosts a number of workshops designed to address many important life issues. “Citizens Advice Bureaux” offer advice and information on finance, welfare benefits and other issues relating to family separation. As well as these support groups, a health visitor is a person who is in touch with the families from the start of parenthood. They have access to the home environment, giving them the opportunity to pick up on any stress and strains in the parents’ relationships and often mothers will confide in them. General Practitioners may also play a key role in supporting both parents as their relationship with the patients and their families may span across many family life cycles. They are, therefore, more likely than any other professional to hear about and intervene when a family transition occurs. However, with all the advice and guidance out there for parents and carers, there does not seem to be as much support for children other than the care given in settings, and the use of books and observation. As the percentage of children growing up in separated families increases it seems that in the future more support for them is required. In conclusion, it is critical to understand that parental separation is not seen as an event but as a process, beginning long before the actual departure of one parent and continuing throughout childhood. This experience is difficult for all, but particularly so for those families where other difficulties already exist. For children, separation is also particularly difficult when it is followed by a number of other changes to the family setting. This may include contact with new step brothers or sisters in a new and unknown environment. It is also evident that settings support families and children in a variety of different ways and ensuring a child-centred approach, and working with the parents, on the basis of need rather than the civil status of the parents is important. Reference List BBC, 2010. David Cameron launches Tories’ ‘big society’ plan. [online] Available at: [Accessed 13 March 2012]. Beckford, M., 2012. Single-parent families reach two million. [online] 20 January. Available at: [Accessed 13 March 2012]. Bowlby, J., 1988. A secure base: clinical applications of attachment theory. London: Routledge. Bradford, K., 2012. Children of separated parents to have legal right to contact with mum and dad. [online] 3 February. Available at: < http://www.parentdish.co.uk/2012/02/03/children-of-separated-parents-to-have-legal-right-to-contact-with-mum-and-dad/> [Accessed 17 March 2012]. Department for Children, Schools, and Families., 2008. Practice guidance for the early years foundation stage. Nottingham: DCSF Publications. Directgov, n.d., Parental rights and responsibilities. [online] Available at: [Accessed 29 March 2012]. Gingerbread, 2010. Statistics. [online] Available at: [Accessed 13 March 2012]. HMSO, 2006. Children’s act 2006. [online] Available at: [Accessed 31 March 2012]. HMSO, 1989. Children’s act 1989. [online] Available at: [Accessed 11 April 2012]. HM Treasury, 2004. Choice for parents, the best start for children: A ten-year strategy for childcare. [online] Available at: [Accessed on 21 March 2012]. Macleod-Brudenell, I. and Kay, J., 2008. Advanced early years. 2nd ed. Harlow: Heinemann. McGhee, C., 2011. Parenting apart. Chatman: Ebury Publishing. Miller, L. and Pound, L., 2011. Theories and approaches to learning in the early years. London: Sage. Mulholland, H., 2012. Ken Clarke reveals plans to give divorced fathers more right. [online] 6 February. Available at: < http://www.guardian.co.uk/law/2012/feb/06/ken-clarke-divorced-fathers-rights> [Accessed 15 March 2012]. Pound, L., 2005. How children learn from Montessori to Vygotsky – educational theories and approaches made easy. London: Step Forward. Pugh, G. and Duffy, B., 2010. Contemporary issues in the early years. 5th ed. London: Sage Publications. Sadek, E. and Sadek, J., 1996. Good practice in nursery management. Cheltenham: Stanley Thornes Publishers Ltd. Smith, P. Cowie, H. and Blades, M., 2003. Understanding Children’s Development. 4th ed. Oxford: Blackwell Publishing. Wade, A. and Smart, C. 2002. Facing family change: Children's circumstances, strategies and resources. [pdf] York: Joseph Rowntree Foundation. Available at: [Accessed 16 April 2012].