Coming_Out_of_the_Shadows__a_Look_Into_an_Individual's_Attempt_to_Stay_Strong_in_the_Wake_of_Vulnerability_in_Alison_Lohans’s_“the_Michelle_I_Know”.

The story “The Michelle I Know,” by Alison Lohans, relates how Michelle tries to battle the fear of Leukemia. Readers learn that even though there are ups and downs in life, people can still have strength to keep going and to never give up. This story, though relatively simple, allows readers to understand how Michelle really feels deep down in her heart. As the character’s emotions are portrayed, readers start to understand Michelle and the conflict that she has to experience. These conflicts and experience made Michelle strong and shaped her to who she is now. Character description was used as well, especially for the comparison between Michelle and Claude. The author uses conflict of man verses self, character development such as character’s emotions and character descriptions, to demonstrate how in tough time people should never give up, no matter how hard the obstacle is. There are many emotions a character can acknowledge; however Michelle experienced negative emotions, such as being pessimistic and disappointed, throughout the story. The author has created the character of Michelle’s personalities very pessimistic. "Probably she was turning into a turnip. Or some kind of squash." (Page 17) Since Michelle had Leukemia, she was always down and negative about herself. She felt that she was ugly no matter how many times people have told her that she was not. She felt that she would still die even though she tried her best to survive. However, when she noticed that there were other people who still cared for her, she would cheer up and try her best to face the truth of reality. So that her loved ones would not be sad and think that she just allows for her death to come. As the course of events goes in the story, Michelle's emotions constantly changes because she learns many new things from observing people. Each time she sees a different person, her emotions would change from one feeling to another because different people have different ways in overcoming obstacles. When she sees Brenda, she's usually tired and disappointed because Brenda is her nurse. However, when she saw Claude, she changed from disappointed to amazement because Claude has had Leukemia for eight years and was still cheerful even though he knew that he might die. Finally when her boyfriend, Rob came in, she became very happy because she knows that even though she has Leukemia, Rob still stuck with her. He is willing to go through all the ups and downs of feeling Michelle’s pain of having Leukemia with her. She learns from different people so she could improve herself by following them. For example, she tries to follow Claude because he is like her role model. Since Claude is always positive about everything, Michelle later follows him to become positive as well. Every time she sees someone new, she learns something new and she becomes stronger. She picks out the good points of Leukemia and strives to excel in that area to make her a better and more positive person. "She had to change gears, fast. Deliberately, she rubbed her hand over her bald head. 'Well, at least this never gets tangled.'"(page 23) All of these emotions that were used helps demonstrate how Michelle tries to conquer it all and stay strong. Conflicts can happen anywhere, but in Michelle's case is having to put up with Leukemia. The conflict that Michelle witnessed was man verses self. It made Michelle realize how weak she is physically even though she may try to stay strong at times. However, even though this conflict would usually make people give up, she still tried her best to survive. No matter the circumstances. When she was in the hospital, she got to meet other people who also had the same problem as her. One of these people is name was Claude. "Claude was old enough to be her father. His arms were bruised like her own. His bald head gleamed with shiny flesh." (page 19) Michelle was able to conquer her conflict since she got to learn from Claude as he was like her role model. Even though Claude wanted to die at times, he thought "We were given a life. You don't throw that out like garbage." (page 20) He told her that "you have to be strong inside. Don't waste yourself fighting the wrong things." (page 21) He felt that we only had one chance to live and we should treasure it and try our best to survive. Again, Michelle learned from Claude that people should not waste their life because of a conflict. As for that, Michelle thought to herself that he was right and that he had "dignity," but she didn't. She felt that she only thought about the bad points about Leukemia and not the positive aspects of it. She always thought on the negative side while Claude always urged himself to keep going and to be strong inside. Alison Lohans also used character description to further analyze the theme of an individual trying to conquer all and stay strong. Having descriptive passages allows readers to get to know Michelle better. When readers get to know Michelle better, they get to think about what Michelle is doing wrong and follow what Michelle is doing right, which is being positive. It would shape them to become a better person. Readers would get to reflect on the bad decisions that Michelle made and that would help the readers by preventing them from doing the same thing. Even though Michelle is negative on the inside, she sometimes tries to act strong in front of others. As the author described Michelle and Claude, there were many similarities they shared. They both have Leukemia with bruises and a bald head, just like any other Leukemia patient. The only difference is that Claude was always positive even with this conflict while Michelle was always negative. However, because of Claude, Michelle became more positive and didn’t allow other people’s thoughts to diminish her self-esteem. Therefore why does Michelle feel the need to put on a wig' It's not that she was ugly but Michelle herself thought she was ugly because she was bald with bumpy ridges on her head. "Well' Am I still ugly'" (page 22) she would ask others when she puts on the wig. In the end, when Rob came to see her, she thought about what Claude had taught her and she started joking about drawing flowers onto her head. "She gulped in a deep breath. 'How do you think it would look with flowers painted on it'" (page 23) This helped Michelle realize that she has to keep standing and she can't fall down no matter the circumstances. In conclusion, "The Michelle I Know" is a story that sends readers a message that one should never give up on themselves no matter the circumstances. The theme of never giving up is shown through using character's emotions by making others care for her and letting Michelle know that. Plus, the conflict that Michelle had to face made Michelle realize how she has to stay strong on the inside as Claude once told her. In addition, using character descriptions helped readers understand Michelle better in a way. No matter what is happening, there are always going to be conflicts in the world, however, people should always stand up and to never give up on what they believe in.