You_Just_Don’t_Understand

You Just Don’t Understand Hear What I Am Really Trying To Say, Tannen’s (1990) book, “You Just Don’t Understand,” explains heterogeneous facts about men and women’s communication styles. Tannen says once these gender differences are sorted out, men and women can recognize and understand how to confront real conflicts, rather than fighting styles. When men and women learn to accept the opposite sex’s conversational styles, they can learn to understand a shared language—where there is symmetry and negotiation of conflicts. It is important to recognize that these linguistic differences between men and women do not stem solely from what Tannen (1990) describes as “cross-cultural communication.” There are very apparent differences in speaking styles; for example, women tend to offer suggestions and give reasons, whereas men tend to give demands without reasons. However, the root of communication conflicts is really the result of the opposite natures of male and female. It is the nature of men to be dominant, and it is the nature of women to be submissive; any revolt against these natures, will cause conflict amongst men and women. Tannen says, “If a man experiences life as a fight for freedom, he is naturally inclined to resist attempts to control him and determine his women, men, tannen, communication, styles, says, man, woman, 1990, boys, nature, understand, girls, differences, words, must, learn, eve, conversational, control, because, very, therefore, reasons, really, natures, mean, language, just, god, give, view, trying, style, same, relationships